The Perfect Size?

Somewhere in our culture, an idea formed. It's the idea that there is a perfect size out there and every girl needs to fit that perfect size. We compare and contrast ourselves with other girls all our lives. It doesn't stop with age. The older we get, the more money we're able to pay to get the look we want.

The battle is inside of each of us. As women, our hearts and identity is so wrapped up in the things we believe about ourselves. And often it's the media, the culture that tells us what to believe. If we can fit the perfect size, have the hair and the clothes that make us feel pretty, we believe we are beautiful. But the moment one of those things doesn't work, it's like a set of dominoes lined up and knocked down in a moment.

What are your core beliefs about yourself? Write them down. Examine where you got that belief from, and if it is a cultural idea or a biblical idea. The Bible is a foundation for the truth of who we are. I don't get any of my beliefs from another source than the Bible.

The voices in our society are quick to label us imperfect. For the girls in middle or high school, the competition is a daily battle. And it can be devastating battle to lose, when rumors and gossip spread like fire, and friendships betray. It seems hopeless when each school day brings another attack. But what does God say? Check out Psalm 139:14-16 to start with:

"For You created my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place. All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be."

God created you as beautiful. A picture of His glory. Though the world may not always applaud us, we aren't looking for approval there anyway. The game they want us to play will just cause us to lose in the end. No matter your size or your shape, we are stamped with approval from God, so we don't need approval from other people.

You are the perfect size! Don't believe the lies you hear, and if that takes putting down some of your magazines and picking up the Bible, do it. A confident woman is someone who knows her worth is not in what she owns, or how she fits a certain image. She smiles on the days ahead and keeps her eyes on Jesus, letting all the other voices disappear.

"She is clothed with strength and dignity. She can laugh at the days to come." Prov. 31:25

-Becca

My favorite time of year

I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving. This was our first Thanksgiving as married couples, which made it all the better. There was a plethora of food, and I was given the job of making sweet potato casserole. But the night before Thanksgiving, I realized that my so-called sweet potatoes were actually yams, which have a more yellow color. But I was determined to make this the best sweet potato/yam casserole yet. And the fact that there were NO leftovers said a lot. So I patted myself on the back!

Bryan and I just bought our Christmas tree from Lowes last night. I was looking at the Noble Firs, but Bryan said that we should have a Fraser Fir. "What's the difference?" I asked. "I don't know. My family always had them growing up." So, we brought home a Fraser Fir, which looks nice and now the smell of evergreen fills our apartment! That's the best part. Not the part where it takes hours to get the tree to be straight. That requires a lot of patience.

Wherever you are this Christmas, I hope you have a fantastic holiday!

~Becca

Don't miss these moments

I (Becca) live on the west side in Colorado Springs, which means wildlife are a-plenty. This morning, a large buck (aka male deer bigger than your dog) stood outside my window. I could have touched him if it wasn't for the wall between us. He looked calm, yet fully aware of everything around him. Another friendly creature that loves my yard is the magpie. As it swooped in towards the deer, I was sure that buck would show the bird who's bigger. Much to my surprise, the bird landed on the back of the deer as if to say "Hello neighbor." And the buck didn't mind at all!

The scene of this just drew me into worship, in awe of our Creator God. Fully in control. Full of mercy, strong yet gentle. We can be like the bird, and find rest in our God as He "quiets us with His love".

For the Lord your God is living among you.

He is a mighty savior.

He will take delight in you with gladness.

With His love, He will calm all your fears.

He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.

Zephaniah 3:17

A Perfect Day

We are posting the wedding photos you have been waiting to see! The exciting double wedding day was fantastic. Most of the details came together smoothly. No tripping on dresses, no crashing wedding cakes. There were only two small mishaps, which are now some of my favorite memories to chuckle over. Chad and I were at the alter enjoying the sweet moment of exchanging rings. As I went to slide his ring on, it got stuck on his knuckle. We were laughing as I struggled to finally get the ring in place.

Becca and Bryan had a comical moment at the alter, too. The pastor turned to them and pronounced them Mr. And Mrs. Bryan Nicholson by the power of the state of Oklahoma. The wrong state! All of our guests were roaring with laughter as the pastor corrected himself with the state of Colorado!

The wedding was beautiful, unforgettable and everything we hoped it to be. Leaving the church at the end of the reception, I wondered what other traffic on the road thought as they saw not one, but two cars driving away with “Just Married” written on the back.

Reflecting on the day I realize the most important part of a wedding is the relationships. Joining two lives, and two families (in our case three families). In many modern weddings, so much of the fuss and emphasis is on getting the look of the wedding just right. But, the heart of the wedding is the only thing that matters. During the process of a double wedding, I had to choose relationship over my own opinion. What color should the font be on the invitation? Who goes down the aisle first? Which one of us gets the real first dance? It was easy to decide these things because we have learned to value each other and our relationships over the little details of life. This is the goal of family and friends, not just weddings.

In the end, the church, the group of Christians you call yourself a part of, should be constantly at work to lift each other up. No matter what event you plan, Christmas pageant or summer picnic, God is most glorified when we are most unified. Jesus prayed that His followers would be one just as He and the Father are one (John 17:21). This is a high calling. As you pursue your passions, seek fulfillment of your life dreams, remember to also pursue unity in the Body of Christ at the same time. In this, Jesus will always be glorified. -Elissa

Maple sweets and Cannoli a-plenty

New England is a unique place, and we made some great discoveries while there for 9 days. The cannoli (right) is one of them. It's an amazing dessert that I tried for the first time. It was a gift from the volunteers at You & Your Girl in Syracuse!

Then upon arriving at the Vermont State Fair we were showered with maple gifts, which was amazing since I had said every day before then that I wanted to take home some maple syrup! I got my wish, times 3! We had to pack the syrup in our merchandise boxes, since the airlines wouldn't give us any more weight in our bags... don't you love flying?

This trip was sooo girl time, and it was great. We found the coolest spots to eat, visited quaint old towns on the coast of Maine, oh, and we did work as well. We had concerts in between all that!

What I loved most about the You and Your Girl conference (our 5th one with LifeWay!) in Syracuse, NY was the open hearts of the women and girls that came. God's presence was powerful during worship, and our heart-to-hearts during the breakouts encouraged me so much. These are girls that are hungry for God! We were all at different places in our journey to know God better, some of us have been on that journey longer than others, but we all share in the common desire to know Him. Nothing else compares!

As I write this, I'm feeling quite stuffed after my mom made this amazing dinner (I helped too people!) and now I'm thinking ice cream would top it off perfectly. My iTunes shuffle just turned to Josh Groban Christmas. I think I'll change it before I start wishing for snow!

~Becca

What a weekend!

We made our way down a narrow dirt road to find ourselves at a stage overlooking an amazing view where many rivers meet. This was yesterday, at Swiftwaters Music Festival at Chop Point Camp in Woolwich, Maine! We got to know Building 429 (see left, pictured with some of the band), Laura Story and Mark Harris. All of us came on stage for a worship song at the end, and then we enjoyed a lobster dinner! Both Elissa and I have never had lobster before, so it was probably very funny for people to watch us. We were frightened of the creature that landed on our plates, complete with eyes and a hard shell that had to be cracked. It's messy business, people. But the meat inside is well worth the crackin! Thanks to Mark Harris for showing us how it's done.

Even though Laura Story (pictured with us on the left) had a flat tire on her way, we were so glad she made it. The entire festival was awesome and we hope next year we can come back.

Friday we flew into Portland, Maine after a long day of traveling through Denver and New York's airports, and we're loving the calm weather (glad the hurricane missed us) and seeing familiar faces. We were here in December, and though the temperate was much different, the folks were very warm and welcoming.

Maine is one of the states everyone must visit. My mom, Elissa and I just spent time at the Coastal Botanical Gardens and they are gorgeous! So many types of flowers and plants I'd never seen before. I'm figuring some of them won't be popping up in Colorado's rocky soil and high altitude, so its nice to see a variety of plants blossoming together.

We ate lunch today at Sarah's Cafe in Wiscasset. (Learned how to pronouce that one the hard way) Across the street I was so amused to see this huge long line leading up to a small dinky shack they call "Red's". It apparentely makes the best lobster rolls, and tons of TV shows and newspapers rave about it. I definitely wanted to try one, but we timed it to see how long it took one couple to get to the front of the line. 45 minutes went by and they were still waiting!

We have a few days off and then a busy set of dates ahead of us.

Happy Labor day!

The Best Dressed

When He walked the earth, Jesus talked about the Kingdom of God, forgiveness, compassion, what to do with our money, and our time. He also talked about clothes. Yes, what we wear matters to God.

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? ~Matthew 6:25

Girls spend a lot of time worrying about what they will wear. We shop, but we’re hardly satisfied with what we have.

Defining Modesty: freedom from vanity

Will you ever regret dressing too modestly? I have yet to meet a person who regrets wearing the types of clothes that promote purity, modesty and a devotion to God. But I have met women who regret dressing immodestly and the impact that it had on their daughters.

Dresses these days look like shirts to me! (My tip: Wear with leggings or jeans to go with!) If you wear a “dress” that hardly covers you, then the result is the entire world will quickly look past your face, past your heart, your character, and simply see what isn’t covered up! When I saw Christina Aguilera on American Idol, I wondered if she was in such a hurry getting ready back stage that she forgot half of her outfit. Poor girl!

So, do we cover ourselves so much because we fear attention or praise? Should we shun beauty, and toss out our makeup and accessories? Keep your shiny belts, girls, because that is not the goal at all! Modesty is not about fearing beauty or hiding ourselves completely. It’s about promoting purity. It’s a matter of the heart first. If our ambition is to attract attention from guys or to look better than everyone else, it’s a selfish desire. It will only come back to hurt us. The results will give us what we don’t want.

Defining purity: freedom from guilt or evil. Innocence.

We must choose to dwell on the truth of who we are. We are more than a new pair of shoes! We are worth more than a passing glance from a guy. Our value isn’t in what we wear. And thank goodness for that! It takes the pressure off. Who you are is priceless, and no new outfit can express that. In both definitions of modesty and purity, one word is consistent: freedom. When we choose to live the way Christ calls us to live, there is freedom! His love brings freedom from the lies of the world.

The next time you put an outfit on in the morning, consider your motives. Are you wearing that so you can be the center of attention? If so, there’s a longing inside that won’t be filled until you let your heart receive God’s unconditional love. Consider your brothers in Christ, and encourage them to live godly lives. You can do that by how you dress, how you treat them, and how you set an example for the girls around you.

I often hear from guys how tough it is to stay pure. And girls, I’m sorry to say we aren’t doing a very good job of helping them out. In the end, we are all responsible for our own actions. For me, being on stage has made me really think twice about what I wear.

I can point people to Jesus, or distract them from Him.

Are you up for the challenge? It will take some tenacity and courage to go against the flow. It won’t be easy when you are shopping with friends and tempted to buy something that you know won’t promote purity. But every act of obedience to God will be rewarded, though your friends may not reward you. The choice is in front of us every day, and my prayer is that you will choose the path of no regrets.

~Becca